….still waiting

Today I’ve been a lot more constructive, I’ve been to get my hair coloured, done the weekly food shop; picked up dog poo (so glam I know). I’ve also decided to clear out what will eventually be the baby’s room. Of course I have a secret Pinterest board with ideas on how I’d decorate it, I started it last week, but after starting it I’ve decided not to look at it again until I get the BFP result.

In the meantime I’m sorting out some boxes of stuff that we put in there when we moved in last year so my hubby can put them in the loft; I’ve also been able to get the books out and onto the bookshelf too! I really feel like I made progress when I realised that three of the really large boxes we had in there are actually empty! That’s so much more progress that I thought we had made in that room!

I started feeling more cramping last night, if I was in a normal cycle this would be unusual this early unless I’m on a really short month. My cycle has been anything between 23 to 35 days; which makes things just that little bit more frustrating. I felt a lot more naucious than I normally do though; another reason could have been the fizzy drink though.

I took another test last night, I realise that this is getting a tad ridiculous however I always wonder if I might see a faint line. Still nothing though; I ordered some more tests on Amazon; so much cheaper and easier than buying them in Boots.

I’m now 10 dpo and I’m not even getting a squinter. I know that for some women this doesn’t happen and they don’t get the positive until AF is late. Even though I feel like I’m being slightly (ok very) neurotic about testing, but it is kind of keeping me going in a way. The more negatives I get I think the more realistic I’m getting that I might not be pregnant this month.

I am also more than aware that this is only our first cycle and there are so so many of you out there that have been trying for months if not years; this keep my feel firmly on the ground

I thought we could have started to try before even going on our Honeymoon, but we got a letter before the wedding saying there had been reported cases of Zika virus in the area and we were advised to wait 8 weeks after we got back and to watch for flu like symptoms between this time. I feel like we’ve waited a life time to even start trying; so these last two weeks feel like I’ve been on pause; you can just picture the foot tapping now!

Though a few phrases come to mind…

‘It is what it is’

‘Que Sera, Sera’ (although I get the song stuck in my head for a bit)

Still doesn’t stop me wanting to press fast forward on this week.

Still thinking positive though!


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