From Waiting… to waiting.

So this is a situation I did not expect to be in although I’ve been aware that it can happen; you just don’t think it will happen to you.

Everything was going along as normal until I reach CD 27 and start getting a very light brown colour in creamy CM. I then start to wonder if AF is starting to come along. The following day is no different, it wasn’t until CD 29 I start to get a very light bleed, so light it would only be enough to wipe. I decided to start using my Diva Cup as I don’t want to use tampons and I hate using pads. The bleed doesn’t get any stronger and at this point I see no clots at all and it’s watery almost. These few days we weren’t at home so I didn’t test at this point. For the next few days the bleed doesn’t stop but also doesn’t get heavier and on CD 30 was also mixed with EWCM. All of this I have never seen before. This is not a usual period for me. On CD 31 I do a test on a cheap eBay strip and get a very faint line.

test1

This is so faint you can barely see it in the photo but it is there, but at this point I’m still getting spotting blood. On CD 32 I get more EWCM, clear, very stretchy, still drops of blood but nothing more. On CD 33 I take a First Response test and this also comes up positive; if possible stronger than before.

test2

It’s still faint but stronger, this is the point where I start to notice the bleeding get worse and slightly heavier. Had it not been for the positive test I would have thought that this was my normal period. My temps at this point were also still elevated. This doesn’t feel normal and I’m glad I have a Doctors appointment already booked. CD 33 the bleeding is heavier again, with clots an I get cramps so severe they make me yelp.

CD 34 is my visit to the Doctors, and so far I have managed to keep a brave face, but the second I sit in her chair the flood gates open and I just burst into tears. I explain to her what’s been happening she told me at this point it’s not possible to tell what’s happened. It is better to test a week after the bleeding has stopped to see if the pregnancy has stuck. It is possible I have had a complete miscarriage, but it is also possible I could have miscarried one of two eggs and the second is clinging on, it is also possible my body is getting rid of excess lining. So, I have to wait further. More waiting, and trying to stay calm and relaxed.

I have another appointment booked in two weeks before hand I will take another test. If it is negative we start the fertility testing process; if the pregnancy has stuck I will be sent for an early scan to make sure everything is Ok.

I am aware this is very common and I have not got attached just yet, I don’t want to get my hopes up. I just have to stay realistic, but stay as positive as I can.

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One thought on “From Waiting… to waiting.

  1. It is such a lesson in waiting and waiting. It’s such a tricky time to keep up the hope when month in and month out things just keep you hanging. I hope you can add to the positives that you two are fertile and now just waiting for the right baby to nestle into your hearts. Good luck and keep trying (at least that bit is fun 😜)

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